Tag Archives: Craig

Dec 12 2012

Getting Down n Dirty on Daddy’s Birthday

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Sunday was Daddy’s birthday - 42 no less!

The whole weekend was dedicated to this and included a romantic meal for two at Bella Italia, the casino, and a nice family meal a Nanny’s house.

We decided to get crafty for daddy’s birthday and Dexter and I made this on Saturday night. We dipped his little hands in water-based paints and Dexter was able to sign Daddy’s card himself. Dexter giggled when his little cards went in the goo and seemed fascinated by the prints left on the card. The paint washed off his hands easily enough but I was still picking out remnants from his hair two days later.

I think this will become a little tradition now. Both Craig and I have birthdays very close to Christmas so the whole season is really expensive. Craig’s reaction to something so simple made me think that we should just ‘make’ our birthday gifts from Dex; they cost next to nothing and hold far more sentimental value than anything we would ordinarily buy eachother.

This year I was even lucky enough to get some Ring Cufflinks from the delightful and beautiful Vikki over at Love From Mummy - these are really special little keepsakes that are perfect for Daddy’s and Grandad’s. Craig doesn’t wear suits or shirts very often but does dress up for horse racing days and weddings. Now he’ll be able to take a little bit of Dexter with him when he goes which is seriously cool.

Craig did get other gifts from me, but I think Dexter’s gifts are his favourite. We topped the Sunday off with a film and an ‘early night’… just goes to show thar the best things in life are free.

Nov 26 2012

“No Photography Allowed”: Dexter’s First Swim

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So, Dexter went for a swim at the weekend.

Since the disaster with the pool on holiday (Dexter hated it) we’ve been hesitant to take Dexie swimming. Our main concern was the temperature. Dexter likes warm baths and hates feeling cold. I’m not a huge fan of swimming either and didn’t want to take him myself. We’ve always thought it was important to take him though as it’s a skill that might one day save his life.

So off we went to a local pool in Reading. It’s the warmest pool we know of so we hedged our bets. Sitting in the spectators lounge - I had to fight the temptation to whip out my iPhone and take pictures. Dexter looked so cute in his little swimsuit splashing around in Craig’s arms. He was so happy and confident in his Zoggs Trainer Seat, Craig noticed he was even kicking his legs in the water beneath. Seeing that Dexter was having fun, Craig decided to be brave and float him instead. Dexter was happy on his back and even reacted well to being briefly underwater. Finally, as the pool was graduated and had no steps - the swallow areas had only a few cms of water and Dexter was able to lay on his front on his knees and lift his head out of the water.

I’d have seriously loved to have come away with some pictures but was deterred by the massive sign by the entrance to the lounge “No photography beyond this point”. There was only myself and one other person sitting in the lounge area and it was clear that neither of us were pedophiles. She was around 40, engrossed in 50 Shades of Grey, and continually checking her watch - every inch the archetypal middle-aged mum taking her children swimming. It made me think - I’d be horrified if there was man in an anorak and a long lens snapping pics of the kids. But then if I were to shoot Mr Anorak an accusatory glance and whisk Dexter away, I suppose I should extend the same suspicions to Mrs 50 Shades. What makes me qualified to decide if someone is acting illegally or not?

In some ways - it’s like the world has gone mad. You wouldn’t wrestle a camera off a man at Disney World just because it’s full of children, yet in Britain, I constantly hear stories of parents being prevented from filming their own children at a nativity play or sports day in case the pictures are misappropriated. Yes - pedophiles are vile and of course we’d all do anything to safeguard our children from predatory advances, but are we taking the whole thing too far? With breaking stories such as the posthumous investigation into Jimmy Saville - the western world is turning increasingly into a ‘trust no one’ society.

But where does it end? When Dexter takes part in his first school play, all I will have to remind me is a photo of him in his costume in front of my fireplace, and not onstage in character. There won’t be an action shot of him winning an egg-and-spoon race either. These were precious memories for my parents and I remember whole albums dedicated to my school days.

Then there’s this blog. I’ve posted hundreds of photos of Dexie. I don’t even bother changing our names. Why should I? This blog is in the public domain, completely unprotected and anyone can view it. But why should I worry? There are millions of pictures of children in their nappies all over the web. Every time we buy a packet of Huggies or Pampers there’s a semi naked baby posing adorably on the packaging!

So what is the solution? Should we ID parents on entry to a swimming pool, school gate, cinema? But wouldn’t this limit the freedom of grandparents and family friends to take children out for the day of fun? Of course this is a ridiculous suggestion. So is the only solution to ban photographing your children in public places? Couldn’t that very same person with horrific motivations be swimming alongside my child in the pool!?

I did manage just a quick one of the boys at the side of the pool and was careful to get no one else in it - but the photo is so awful I was reluctant to post it. Dexter looks so chubby it doesn’t even look like him - but hey for prosperity’s sake - here’s my baby on the day of his first ever swim with Daddy. Yet another example of me flaunting the rules… ssshhh don’t tell anyone!

Nov 26 2012

American Pie: The Reunion… the antidote to PND?

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When the doctor first diagnosed me with postnatal depression 2 months ago - I was literally knocked sideways. I had just given birth to a beautiful and healthy baby, had an amazing man by my side, and had nothing to be unhappy about! I only went to the doctors as I had separation anxiety when Dexter and I were apart and was I hugely self-conscious about it.

Since that day, things got progressively more difficult in our home. I found myself analysing my relationships even more; with both Dexter and Craig. I was so consumed with parenting, poor Craig didn’t get too much of a look-in. A typical day would involve Craig going to work, returning home and cooking dinner with Dex, whilst I had some hands-free time. We’d eat in silence as the television was on, bath Dex, feed him, and settle him down. With all the practical bits of running a home, Craig and I would rarely get any quality time together. I’d go to bed first, and would often be asleep by the time Craig finished up downstairs.

It’s always been in the back of my mind that Craig and I need more ‘alone’ time - but until this weekend I just couldn’t seem to put it right. We’d just got so used to our routines. I was constantly tired and our little bundle of joy just seemed to need me more than Craig did.

The by-product of all this obsessing meant it got to the point where all our conversations were about Dexter and we rarely laughed together or had a kiss and a cuddle. I mistakenly thought that Dexter was the centre of our world and that it would be our achievements as parents that would make us stronger as a couple. I wouldn’t go so far as to say Craig and I were ever in danger of falling out of love with each other - I just lost track of what was important.

Reading Festival - 2011 - Life before Dexter

The realisation came for me when we watched American Pie: The Reunion this weekend. Craig got home on the Friday with a bottle of wine and a dine-in-for-two type affair. I was bored of I’m a Celebrity (shock - horror!) and was fed up of staring at the laptop, so suggested we pop on the latest offering from Lovefilm.

The film wasn’t great. It was typical American Pie humour; cringeworthy and ridiculous. But ironically there was something I could actually relate to this time round. Michele and Jim had had a baby and were struggling to make ‘time’ for each other. This was the overrunning theme the whole way through - at first it was their son that got in the way, then their friends; they were both out of sync and concerned about the impact on their relationship.

It wasn’t lost on me that Craig kept glancing at me. He’s tried to talk to me about it before but I’ve always quickly changed the subject. I must admit that there are parallels between their relationship and ours - but (for me) these aren’t the obvious ones. What struck me most was what worked about their relationship are the same things that work in ours. The reason Craig and I got together in the first place was because we were able to make each other laugh. Somehow, along the way, I’d forgotten this - but Craig hasn’t and he’s been missing me.

So many times we’ve discussed how “We’ve changed” as a result of having Dexter. We’ve quite rightly “grown up” and have new “responsibilities” - all the old clichés. I think I took this a million steps too far though and fell into the trap of thinking Craig would be impressed if I was the ‘perfect parent’ and would love me more for it. What I’ve realised is that being a good parent is one thing, but it’s also important to be a good girlfriend. Both need equal amounts of my energy and time.

I always found it a little strange that some mothers blog so candidly about their experience with postnatal depression and their relationships. I couldn’t stand the thought of Dexter ever reading that I was sad, or that his mummy ever ‘struggled’. I grew up in a household blighted by my own mothers depression, and desperately didn’t want Dexter to experience the same thing. My friends and family also read this blog and I honestly believe that some things should remain private. So what’s changed now?

This blog is all about our family; Craig and I are just as much protagonists as Dexter is! I’m just as likely to feel compelled to write about Dexter’s little achievements as I am about ours. This week I smashed the hell out of PND - and that’s a pretty big deal.

I just feel differently about depression now. It doesn’t define me and it’s not like I’ve done something wrong. PND is simply a result of my post-baby hormones and isn’t any more than that. I’m not going to give it anymore thought or attention - I’ve got more important things to do with my life - like play with Dex and Craig.

I don’t have to worry that Dexter won’t understand why I’ve decided to write this post. All he’ll know is that he has a fun-filled house with a mummy and daddy who are human and do their best. There’ll be plenty of stories behind our success as a family - this is simply one of them.

Nov 19 2012

Dear Santa… (a.k.a Craig)

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I’m sat here racking my brains to come up with a reason why I deserve a present this year. I’ve done some terrible things and it suddenly occured to me that you might decide to buy me a tea towel (or something equally hideous) as punishment. I read somewhere once that Santa still considers dropping by if you get in quick and say sorry - so here we go…

I’m sorry that I…

  • Demand absolute silence during Downton Abbey & the Young Apprentice (as the BBC has no breaks and I can’t concentrate for extended periods)
  • (Occassionally) fake the odd headache to get to bed early / avoid dealing with Dexter when he’s stroppy
  • Always steal the last Muller Fruit Corner when your back’s turned
  • Smirk when Manchester United lose at football
  • Made you buy an exercise bike and haven’t used it once
  • (Often) use your last razor blade to shave my legs
  • Sneak the heating on full when you’ve expressly told me not to
  • (Often) made myself ‘busy’ after dinner to get out of the washing up
  • Pretended for months the vacuum cleaner didn’t cater for left-handed people to get out of the hoovering

And that’s just crimes against you!

As you know, I’ve also accidentally stolen some Soya tablets and a bottle of Cilit Bang from Tescos as my coat was positioned so that I couldn’t see it in the trolley. Then there’s the bottle brush from MAM we accidentally pinched from the BabyShow as we both thought the other one had paid for it! I noticed both these crimes before we left the car park’s and didn’t go back to re-correct my mistakes.

So really, all things considered, you could say I don’t deserve a present. You could even shop me to the police!

But if can look past all the above - and can stand the thought of sharing your bed with Reading’s version of Bonnie for another year…

I’d reeeeaaaaallllyyyy like one of these…

As you’re not the sharpest when it comes to computers, you need to click on the image. This will take you through to the Dinky Fingerprint Company - or you can just click here.

Now I know you like to have researched every purchase you make. You’ll be pleased to know, I’ve done the hard work for you on this one. I’ve checked out rival company’s and this is the one I want. I’m thinking muted browns, ambers or greens rather than Barbie Pink.

Thank you my darling… til next year…
Gemma

Nov 13 2012

Who is the Boss in your house?

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This weekend I skulked around Dexter’s nursery watching my Craig settle Dexter to sleep. I wasn’t spying I was having a ‘mummy moment’ and watching my boys having a cuddle. Dexter was fighting sleep and crying and Craig was soothing him. In response to Dexter’s whinging, Craig joked:

Come on mate. You’re not the boss of this house. There’s only one boss here and that’s mummy. She’s makes all the decisions, then it’s daddy’s job to pay for them

I grimaced. I know Craig was joking as he’s so rarely serious. He’s unoffical king of the one-liners and it’s one of the reasons I fell in love with him. But this one made me stop and think. I snuck away and mulled it over. It made me contemplate my role in our household

I really don’t see myself as bossy. I’m independent, strong-minded and occasionally sharp-tongued, but I’m mostly fair. I don’t make most of the decisions either. The truth is both of us are dire at making decisions. If we have to pick a restaurant, excursion or holiday, we both spend more time deciding than enjoying the actual treat. He surely wasn’t referring to this.

But then I glanced over to Dexter’s toy box and it struck me. Most of the the toys in that box, were chosen by me. The ELC sit-me-up cosy I was so insistent upon, but is rarely used; the Lamaze Spin and Explore that I was so convinced Dexter would enjoy. To the side of the sofa is Dexter’s Christmas box - it’s full to the brim with little bargains I’ve spotted online.

Then there’s his nursery. I chose and bought all the bedding and decorations without even consulting Craig. Even the canvasses on the wall. I bought them, chose the pictures, and hung them when Craig was at work to surprise him. In fact, I seem to have had a hand in every design / purchase decision in this house.

I’m not saying I buy everything - Far from it! Craig manages our household bills and keeps a roof over our head. He’s the only one with an Amazon account (which is probably a good thing) and I’m constantly sending him links of things to buy. He’s also forever running out in the van to collect something I’ve purchased locally from eBaby. If it’s a ‘big’purchase (furniture etc), we always sit down and talk about it - but the final choice is usually mine.

I will admit to being a ‘marketer’s dream’. I’m known to read magazines and put post it’s on pages with sites to check out, things to buy, and inspiration. Similarly, If I see anything innovative that appears to solve a parenting problem, I have to have it. Having said that I usually pay for these things myself so Craig doesn’t know a thing about it until it’s in the cupboard / toybox. I’m not a spendaholic though as I’m also quite disciplined. I have a ‘wish list’ of things I’m coveting but can’t afford. I know one day I’ll get them. It’s just a case of prioritising and waiting for the January sales. To be honest - with all the fantastic discount codes around, I can’t remember the last time I paid the full price for anything!

So I guess you could say, I am a boss of sorts. Far from being sad about this realisation. I’m actually quite comforted by it. Craig’s little quip is actually quite ‘telling’. He sees me as homemaker and avid parent ‘researcher’. He trusts my decisions and is happy to make the expensive ones happen financially. I’d go so far as to say that Craig enjoys providing us with things when budget allows. He is also a nurturing and loving daddy. If I’ve suggested a toy that claims to “promote motor skills and hand / eye coordination”, he won’t question it, we’ll buy it and both get on our hands and knees on the floor to help Dexter get the most out if it.

I don’t often think too deeply about my role in the home. I tend to just get on with it. Craig’s role is much more defined and structured - he’s the glue that keeps us all together. If he likes to see me as the boss, I don’t feel that’s a bad thing. All in all - we are quite the team.

Nov 11 2012

Why we love Sundays!

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With daddy home, we get to dress up and mess about with the camera! I bought this cute little hat weeks ago and couldn’t wait to shoot you in it.

We get to do bits and pieces in your room too. Daddy is nice and tall so can help me pin up decorations. I’ve wanted to put up this heart garland from Butterflies and Ballerinas for months and months but I’m a tiddly 5ft 4 and couldn’t reach far enough up the nursery wall. We also had some bunting to put up. Your room is now my favourite in the house and I love being in there.

Sunday is also Fun-day, we can get messy and paint knowing that daddy will be on hand with baby wipes when we’ve finished! I’ve been meaning to do your paw prints for ages but suspected you’d furl up and we wouldn’t get a print out of you. This was definitely a three person job and I’m glad we managed it before your 6 month birthday on Friday. We’ve decided to do these every 6 months now so we can see how much you’ve grown.

Finally - I get to wrap up Christmas presents - my favourite way to relax. Yes, it’s early November and I’m nearly done!

Oct 26 2012

Dear Dexter

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Dear Dexter,

Well you’re now 5 months old which simply doesn’t seem possible! Although it seems only yesterday I was rocking you to sleep in the hospital, you’ve transformed our lives so much we just can’t remember what life was like before you were in it. Despite this, mummy and daddy stll joke that it feels like we’re on borrowed-time and are just looking after you until someone comes to take you back! We’re just so overwhelmed with pride and love for you that we struggle to put our feelings into words.

This has definitely been an exciting month for mummy and daddy as you’re so much more active! We’ve now regulated Lottie (your activity mat) to your toy chest as you seemed to be signing that you’re ready for something new. So this month you’ve road-tested some ‘big boy’ toys and have begun spending time in Ermintrude (your sit-me-up cosy as renamed by daddy), and have much more tummy-time.

You continue to love gazing at yourself in the mirror and you’re responding more to squeaks and music from your toys. Our favourite thing to do is place a favourite toy slightly out of your reach, flip you on your tummy, and encourage you to stretch out and reach it. We’re not convinced you’ll be crawling by the end of the month but we’re getting there!

Image courtesy of Tegan Suzanne Photography

You continue to be the most beautiful baby mummy and daddy have ever seen. You are beginning to recognise us more now and we know you are always pleased to see us as you reserve your bestest smiles just for us. The funniest ones are when you first wake and we scoop you up for a cuddle, and when you’ve achieved something new and mummy and daddy clap to reward you. Those smiles are so wonderful as they’re almost half excitement / half bewilderment - as though you can’t understand what all the fuss is about.

Image courtesy of Tegan Suzanne Photography

As you rarely cry, people are always commenting how well-behaved you are, and mummy can not help but feel proud. You’re a wonderfully social baby and are happy to be fussed over by complete strangers. You seem to take every new experience in your stride and it’s comforting to know you trust mummy so implicitly.

We’ve had the odd night where you’ll wake in the night. This is pretty out of character for you so you’ve caught us unprepared. In our bleary-eyed state we initially made the mistake of bringing out the “big guns” at 2am; bottles, cuddles and popping you in the bed next to us. Although these tricks are undoubtably successful, they seem to take much longer in the middle of the night! It’s pretty clear however that mummy and daddy are too fidgety to embrace co-sleeping. I’ve often woken in the night with pins and needles only find you’ve fallen asleep in my arms. I’ll also worry continually about daddy rolling onto you as he isn’t aware you are next to him. In any case, the very act of picking you up, rocking, or feeding you also just serves to wake you up even more, which isn’t the desired goal in the dead of the night!

Image courtesy of Tegan Suzanne Photography

Finally, mummy has been deep in conversation with Father Christmas this week and he’s sent some amazing things through the post. It’s been very tough resisting the urge to give you your new toys straight away. I simply can’t wait to see your little face on Christmas morning when you rip open the paper and see what you’ve got xx

All in all it’s very exciting and we can’t wait to see what next month has in store.

Love Mummy and Daddy xx
NOTE: These stunning shots of Dexter were taken by Tegan of Tegan Suzanne Photography. If you’d like to know more about her packages, you can like her on FB here

Oct 15 2012

Loving my little family

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What did I ever do to deserve such an amazing family?

We’ve had a rough time of it in the Mills household. I’ve taken the tough decision to go back on maternity leave. Despite a promising showdown with my mother in hospital, she’s now rediscovered her demons and is ill again. As I’m fearing the worst, I’ve chosen to spend a bit more time with her. Craig has therefore had to forsake his daddy-time and go back to work full-time. It’s taken a lot of late-night chats and tears to get to this point but it’s now decided and I’m with Dexie until February.

Craig allergies also took hold this week and he came down with a full-blown chest infection. He’s a Man so doesn’t complain but I forced him to go to the out-of-hours surgery on Saturday after listening to him struggle to breathe throughout the night. The problem: Billy. I’ve tried to ignore it since Craig and I started living together but it clearly couldn’t go on any longer. Billy the cat is my best friend. I’ve had him for 6 years and he’s been through various house-moves and failed relationships with me. We’ve been inseparable since I got him and I’m gutted that he and Craig can’t live together. But Craig is desperately allergic to Billy and I simply can’t jeopardise his health any longer.

Missing my hairy son Billy

So Billy was re-homed yesterday. He’s gone to live with his Nan and Granddad about 10 minutes down the road. I’m gutted but pleased I’ll still get to see him regularly. He’s well used to staying around Nanny’s house as she’s had him over when Craig and I have taken weekends away. I know he’ll be more than happy there but I still miss tripping over him on the stairs, him meowing at me for a second breakfast because he thinks I’m oblivious to the fact that Craig has already fed him, him chasing dust around the lounge… He’s such a little legend there were no shortage of ‘takers’.

So Craig can finally get some respite. The doctor says he has a chest infection. His chest is really quite weak from years of smoking in his childhood. He gave up years ago but the damage was irreparable and the slightest cold sends him wheezing and brings on his asthma. inevitably, with all the sneezing, I’ve now got it. Luckily, I’m still covered by a flu jab during my pregnancy and tend to fight off illnesses easily. But poor Dexie is, as yet, untested.

He started displaying signs of a cold last night. He sounded a little bit like Darth Vader and was coughing a fair bit. Then the sneezing set in and we began to worry. Dosed with Calpol, and saline drops we put him to bed with a Karvol tissue buried in his teddies. He didn’t complain once and went to sleep. I was up with him again at 3am as he started crying and wrestling with his blanket. As the heating wasn’t on and this house gets chilly downstairs in the night, I changed him in his room then told him I’d be back with things ‘to make him feel better’. I’m not naive and know he doesn’t understand me, but he patiently waited for me to return with a warm bottle and more Calpol. He was so quiet I thought perhaps he had gone back to sleep, but no, he was watching the door waiting for me to return and smiled when I approached his cot.

I administered his meds and he was quiet and seemingly grateful. He snatched his bottle from my hands and fed himself as if to say “I’m okay mum, stop fussing”. I went back to bed when he’d finished and left him coo’ing at his toys. The plan was to let him tire himself out so he would fall asleep naturally. Unfortunately he cried again within 15 mins. I gave him a big cuddle and popped him in bed with us and fell asleep within seconds. The whole night-time saga lasted 3 hours which seems like a lifetime at that time in the morning. It’s also completely out of character given he usually sleeps right through. Having said that, it was an absolute pleasure looking after him as he was such a brave little man. We’re very in-tune with each other now and I feel really confident that I can trust my mummy instincts to help him through the difficult times.

I’m definitely feeling very grateful this week. My employers were very sympathetic and understanding, Craig continues to surprise me with his undying support, love, and resilience, and Dexter is the most perfect baby I could ever have wished for. Given I have thrown more than my fair share of tantrums this week, I’m really in awe of my little family and dedicate this post to them.

Sep 25 2012

A fairytale wedding and excellent first holiday for Dexter (… & some serious eye candy for the ladies)

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So here it is - the post I’ve been putting off. There’s just so much to say about our recent holiday that I’ve been finding housework to do rather than contemplate it. But its such a major event in Dexter’s life, it deserves a good write-up - so here we go.

Our holiday began at 2am on Friday 14th October - we drove to Gatwick in Grandad’s car with Dexie fast asleep beside us in his car seat. We thought we’d left plenty of time to clear all the airport formalities but we ended up having to run for the departure lounge! Our meet-and-great service was terrible and the TravelEx girl was desperately flirting with Craig so we were held up before clearing security. Luckily having Dexter with us meant we had speedy-boarding with Easyjet - so we had a few minutes to recover from the airport dash before the plane took off. The flight was largely empty which was excellent news as Dexie got his own seat in-between mummy and daddy - he was amazing and slept virtually the whole flight.

We arrived at the apartment tired, excited, and desperate for a swim. Unfortunately my suitcase broke on the flight so I held everyone up at Faro airport reporting missing items with Lost & Found. The apartment was listed on both Owner’s Direct and HomeAway.co.uk and seemed to show stock photos of other apartments for sale in the complex. Because of this we weren’t 100% sure how they would look in the cold light of day. We weren’t disappointed as they were stunning. The decor was lovely, and the rooms were huge. All of us remarked throughout the holiday that you could quite happily live there. There were also some extra features like a touch screen stove, state-of-the-art air con and all the mod cons you could think of.

Dexter explores the beach - he liked the feel of the sand on his toes

My only criticism of the apartments would be the pool. There was some light maintenance needed and it was much too cold for Dexter. As I’m not a strong swimmer, I thought this wouldn’t bother me but it was so hot out there that the pool was essential for cooling off.

We were based in Quarteira - a small beach town that was largely closed for the summer. It was perfect as I didn’t want a busy resort given I’m still carrying my baby-weight. We spent a large chunk of our time relaxing on the beach or having a few beers at the beach-side bar. Dexter coped fantastically with the heat and was perfectly happy in his Koo-di travel cot laying on the beach. This was undoubtably the best thing we packed as it kept him in the shade and allowed him to nap wherever we went.

The worst buy has to be his pushchair. Although the Quinny Buzz 3 is brilliant and everything we want from a pushchair, we bought ours secondhand the wheels were very worn. They only lasted 6 hours in the heat before one burst unexpectedly whilst we were out. Unfortunately the apartments had already let out their only on-site pushchair to another couple so we were screwed. We tried his Mamas and Papas baby carrier but Dexter is really heavy and it was too hot to use this all the time. We ended up popping in a new inner tube (we brought one with us) and tying some rubber gauze around the hole in the tyre - this seemed to do the trick.

Somehow Dexter settled into a routine perfectly. We still gave him a bath every night using his Summer Infant bath seat and this worked perfectly. He was asleep every night by 8pm with no fuss, and woke up at 6am ready for play-time and a bottle. This was brilliant as nanny and grandad could babysit for us and we could grab a taxi into Vilamoura for drinks and food. We hadn’t expected Lynne and Terry to be so generous with their baby-sitting but it was much appreciated as Craig and I really enjoyed having time alone. We ate in some gorgeous restaurants (our favourite was the Mayflower) and talked loads about Dexter and the sort of parents we want to be. It was actually really romantic staring across the marina with a few drinks, and reminded me why I’m so in love with Craig and my little family.

Dexter really enjoyed having a whole uninterrupted week with daddy

Of course, the whole reason we were in Portugal was to attend the wedding of Alison and Kenny. Kenny is one of daddy’s closest friends and they used to live together back in daddy’s care-free days. Alison’s dad used to own a villa in the Algarve so it’s close to her heart. About 50 of us flew out to be part of their special day which is testament to them being so lovely. When Dexter was born, Alison and Kenny were the first to invite us round for a BBQ. I’ll never forget crying in their garden because Dexie wanted a feed and I was too tired to breastfeed. This BBQ was where Craig and I decided on the name Dexter after quizzing Kenny and Alison’s children Reece, Jay, Jess and Becca. They managed to convince Craig that the name isn’t synonymous with big glasses stuck together with sellotape and being dunked into toilets at school.

The wedding was beautiful. The entire day was spent at an exclusive hotel and we had the run of the entire grounds. The ceremony was held in the shaded garden and was pretty much perfect. The music was provided by an acoustic guitarist that looked like he’d starred in a Whitesnake video but he was excellent. The vicar was really funny and threw in a few jokes throughout the service too. Jess (Alison’s daughter) gave a brilliant reading too which brought a little tear to my eye. If I have a daughter and she grows up to be anywhere near as bubbly, friendly and confident as either Becca or Jess I’d be the proudest mum on the planet. To top it all off, Alison and the girls looked really stunning - it really was an idyllic wedding.

Dexter was supposed to make an appearance at the reception with nanny and grandad but the taxi drivers out there were shocking and failed to turn up. Lynne had already woken Dexter to dress him and felt it would be cruel to take him when he was so sleepy. I was a bit gutted as I’d been raving about him all day and wanted to show him off (but to be honest we were both a little drunk!). Lynne was also going to bring a much-needed pair of flip-flops with her as my feet were ruined in the heels I was wearing. To be honest I picked the worst outfit ever. Everyone else was in maxi dresses and managed to keep cool. I, on the other hand, wore a silk shift dress that showed every lump and bump. It also marked easilyand I was stuck with a water mark from a champagne glass before the ceremony even began. I’ve had to untag myself from a few pictures of me that were posted innocently on Facebook as I can’t bear looking at myself - time to hit that diet and get back into a size 12 I reckon.

Craig was on form as always. He looked really lovely and was really funny after a few drinks. There was some ‘dad dancing’ on the dancefloor and lots of bad jokes. The after-dinner speeches were great with Py (the best man) and Kenny trying to outdo each other with the comedy. It’s really lovely that all Craig’s friends are so close after all these years. Many of them have known each other since secondary school (that’s a good 30 years). They’re a really great bunch of guys and I guess our own wedding will be just as fun if we get everyone drunk enough.

The resort in the early morning - everything was perfectly manicured

Our apartment from the beach - we were seconds away from this everyday - bliss!

We were so close to the beach!

On the last night we took out nanny and grandad for a posh meal to say thanks for coming on holiday with us. It was a really relaxed week with them, and their support was invaluable. They were really lovely company too and we had a few giggles along the way. Dexter is lucky to have such awesome grandparents. As we were waiting for the meet-and-greet service at the airport on the way out to Portugal - mummy overheard nanny Lynne chatting to a lady and heard her say “We don’t see enough of him” (about Dexter). It broke my heart a little bit. We should all see each other much more than we do - hopefully Craig can take Dexter to see his mum and dad more often now he’s in charge of day-time childcare.

Terry and Lynne at the Mayflower Restaurant in Vilamoura Harbour

So what did we learn about Dexter on holiday? We learnt that he’s an amazingly well-behaved and happy child. He handles change brilliantly and always has a smile for us. His sleeping is much improved and he’s regularly managing 12 hour night-sleeps, with a few naps throughout the day. We can now leave him with babysitters with confidence knowing he won’t fuss throughout the night. This is excellent as it means we can go out for dates more regularly. We’ve also learnt that Dex hates cold water and it’ll take a while for him to enjoy swimming. We’re going to try taking him to the local pool here in Reading as its heated - if that doesn’t work we might have to leave it awhile before trying again. Finally, our little lad will sleep anywhere. The one night he came out with us in the evening he sat in a bar with us whilst Craig watched a Champions League match - the noise was deafening. After this there was a live band and karaoke… Dexter slept through the whole lot!

Craig and I have now promised each other that we’ll go away a least once every year. It’s important for us that Dexter grows up having seen and experienced different places. He needs to realise there’s more to life than ‘home’ so he grows up worldly and responsible. This was a relaxing beach holiday and one spent with family and friends. In the future, when he’s old enough, we’ll take Dexter to places where we can explore the local culture and we can entertain him easily. We’ve spoke about Disney World (my idea of hell but a rite of passage for any child), Safari’s and other clichéd holiday destinations. They’ll need to be lots for him to do so we can fill his days with new experiences. Until he’s old enough to appreciate it, we’ll pick parent-friendly destinations where we can enjoy the peace and quiet. I know Mauritius and the Maldives are high on our list.

As there is so much we want to see and do as a family, it’s unlikely we’ll go back to Portugal. It would have to be somewhere really special for us to visit somewhere twice. As a relaxing beach holiday however, we’d definitely recommend Portugal. It was so family-friendly and the climate was perfect in late September. I really liked the way that the Portuguese seem to really love spending time with their children. They eat late into the night and there were countless buggies past 10pm down on the Marina. The prices are excellent and there are lots of water parks and boat excursions in the peak season. We didn’t do any of these as it wasn’t what we wanted from this holiday but I’ve heard that they’re well worth the money. We stayed at the Cavalo Preto apartments in Quarteira (right next to the beach). These apartments were truly stunning and great value for money given they are a short taxi ride away from the action-packed Marina.

Finally, I know I promised some eye candy for the ladies. So here’s my Craigy! He was separated-at-birth from David Beckham don’t you know!

Sep 12 2012

Giggles, gymnastics and posing at 4 months

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I can’t believe how quickly you’re growing! Looking back through photos of you laying next to your earliest cuddly toys, you seemed dwarfed by some of them! Now, you’re able to grab and chew them with ease.

Your little personality is coming into its own now. You’re cheerful and endearing, sweet-tempered and loving. A tearful tantrum is always followed by a smile and you’re able to calm yourself down now without mummy. You’re also an avid chit-chatterer and each day you’ll make a new sound. Giggles are now prolonged and more frequent and just when mummy thought she couldn’t love you any more, she finds a little bit of extra room in her heart with every laugh you give.

Your legs are now super strong. Everyday you’ll come into mummy’s bed in the morning after daddy has gone to work. You’ll finish your long sleep with mummy then wake us up at 8am by kicking off the bed sheets and giggling beside me. You also love to stand up. After changing your nappy on your mat, you’ll stretch out your arms towards me and I’ll pull you up by your arms into an upright position. Standing there smiling in your sleepsuit you look like a mini gymnast after a world-class floor routine.

How much did mummy and daddy struggle getting a shot of you on your legs?!

You continue to take such stunning photographs and seem to enjoy posing. Mummy and daddy both have photos of you set as the background on their laptops and you seem to recognise yourself whenever you catch a glimpse of our screens.

We have had the odd bad day. You gave your dad a fright a few weeks ago when you screamed for 2 hours whilst mummy was having a few drinks with her friend, and yesterday you refused to let me put you down all day. We put these outbursts down to you feeling a bit tired or a bit unwell. They are always short-lived and never a problem.

We’ve had just one accident so far when mummy dropped an iPhone on your head. You sustained a tiny cut on your eyebrow and mummy stayed up all night crying. I’m sure this is the first of many knocks and scrapes but I could do without another for a few months as I was devastated.

Rolling still seems a long way off, but your sitting is progressing well and its only a matter of time before you can do this unaided.

This next month will be a big one for you. We have the challenge of introducing you to ‘grown up’ food, you’ll be going swimming for the first time ever with daddy on holiday, and I suspect we might get a ”mama” or “dada” out of you. We’re also moving house and moving you into your own room, and mummy is going back to work. These are massive things for us both to deal with and I’ve had lots of tears myself as I’ll really miss being with you during the day. Daddy will be with you from 10am - 3pm and I know you’ll make him as happy as you’ve made me with lots of giggles and little milestones. Just don’t forget mummy please, and save some smiles for me in the early evening.