I thought long and hard on how to frame this review. The LUNA Smart Bead from LELO is a real two-header - not only is it one of the smartest (and indeed revolutionary) Kegal trainers on the market, it’s also hailed as a noiseless, nifty and discreet sex toy. Do I tell you how great it is for getting your pelvic floor back to pre-birth condition? Or do I gush plentiful (BAD choice of words, but way too irresistible) about its night-time credentials?

Having given it a thorough road test I think the answer came naturally enough.

“This really is an intuitive and clever Kegal exerciser, but it’s a very average vibrator”

So what is it?

LELO’s LUNA Smart Bead is a silicone interactive Kegel exerciser. It’s a diddy little thing, (around 3 inches long), and features a robust retrieval chord. Powered off one AAA battery, and arriving in a cute silk pouch for stashing in your sock drawer, it looks every inch the slick device for the “uninitiated” woman (if you can get past the gharish colourways).

My only negative upon seeing it for the first time is that it comes with one (yes one) sachet of lube, and would have benefited from a whole tube of something special (I’d recommend Yes, or Swoon for great quality organic lubrication) so women can get off to a good start without having to nip to Boots.

The concept is simple. Turn on the Smart Bead, insert it vaginally and 3 quick pulses will alert you that the 5 minute program is about to be begin. It’ll then deliver bursts of vibration (that become longer and more intense) which you’re instructed to squeeze your Kegel muscles around for the duration of the vibration. In-between vibrations you simply rest your pelvic floor and try to forget you have a foreign object inside you. The workout is complete when it vibrates in quick succession 3 more times.

That alone is hardly a novel concept, but it does boast some seriously impressive features. Intelligent memory function remembers your progress, and automatically adjusts as your muscles strengthen over time. Each time you go to use it (it’s recommended for daily use) the light will blink between 1 and 5 times, showing you your progress (1= fairly weak, 5= pretty strong, and anywhere in between). In a round about way, this rates your orgasm potential and gives you a routine based on that the next time you use it. It even remembers how your routine is going when you change batteries.

So what let it down?

The promise of completing your exercises and treating yourself to a little me-time (your LUNA Smart Bead will also deliver static vibration) proved disappointing. The vibration is just too weak to get you where you want to go, and your fingers will quickly go numb as you try. If only it could deliver on this front as well I’d be far more likely to whip it out everyday.

More minor points would be the naff colourways (light and dark pink - where’s the black??) and the fact it isn’t rechargeable (a feature usually synonymous with Lelo’s vibrators), yet I’m having to tell continually remind myself this product has a greater purpose than joining Craig and I in bed.

Better offerings for pleasure-seekers

Want one?

At £69 it’s a fair price for a great product. You can buy direct from LELO here (I’d be willing to bet you wind up with one of the above too - the LELO Liv 2 is, perhaps inappropriately, coming my way courtesy of Santa in 2 weeks time). For more reviews, I’d recommend following them on Twitter too (@LELO_Official) as I’m not the only mummy to give this a good going over.

In conclusion, although I didn’t end up squeezing my babies out naturally, I’m all too aware of the repercussions of doing so. This is a really great idea for women who need a little extra push to stick with Kegal exercises, who need more guidance in their routine, or who would positively faint at the thought of using Kegal balls. Positioning it as a two-for-the-price-of-one gives positive reinforcement to personal stimulation which, as an advocate, sits very well with me too.

I like it LELO, but if you wanted to send me something else, Craig and I would be very happy come Christmas!