Is fat ever sexy?

Posted on

Since going on my #OpBabyWeight diet in the first week of January, I’ve had to endure some pretty ugly showdowns with the bathroom scales. We’ve never been friends and I had to Dettol off the dirt and dust before climbing on them. Instead, I’ve always preferred to gauge how big or little I am by how tight my clothes feel. I currently take a size 16 but I like to tell people this is purely because of my big boobs and nothing to do with the size of my tummy; naturally, I’m fibbing.

It’s taken me almost 3 years (since having Dexter) to accept I have to lose some pounds. Despite wobbling a little when I walk, seeing unflattering pictures of myself in the press, and failing to turn heads when I’m dressed up to the nines, the truth was I was in serious denial about my weight. Such serious denial it bordered on body dysmorphia.

This is how I feel (3 years ago)

296517_2226960628310_766369828_n

The thing that finally convinced me was a frank conversation with my other half. Until then he’d skirted around it for fear of upsetting me, but one night in December he innocently whispered to me in bed that my weight has never “bothered” him. My first instinct was to respond with a curt “Why would it?”. To me, I looked fine. After a few seconds though I understood he was trying to tell me I was bigger than he’d like.

It hurt. Of course it did. The man I plan on marrying had basically let it slip that I was fat.

Me now

984033_10151417911367190_1061494130_n

Yet even though the big diet is in full swing, I don’t want to lose too much weight. I’d be very happy to make it to 10st and a curvaceous size 12. To me, size 12 looks healthy, desirable and beautiful - and more importantly, it’s achievable too.

My view seems to resonate with many. Whilst reading an article on Celebrity Watch about some of the weird diets favoured by celebs, I spotted they referred to survey by My Voucher Codes. The popular online voucher site had commissioned a survey of 500 men and 500 women to see whether their perception of the ideal body shape accords with that the media so often portrays: do we all secretly long to be super skinny, and do men really find a little meat on the bone sexy?

Kim-Kardashian-Main

So, at a time when most of us are frantically signing up to Weight Watchers and stocking our fridge full of kale, cucumber and hummus to fulfill our New Year’s resolutions, My Voucher Codes sat hundreds of men and women down and gave them pictures of women from size 8 to size 16. They were then asked which body shape and size most appealed.

The results are a little surprising:

Results

If maths isn’t your strong point, this means a staggering 43% of men, and 37% of women surveyed preferred the images of a size 14 woman

Given size 14 is the average size of women here in the UK, this is good news for us girlies. Unfortunately it seems my hankering after a size 12 isn’t great though given this is the least preferred size in the range!

skinny celebrities

Okay, we have to wonder what these pictures were. Were they pictures of celebrities? Was a flattering shot of Kim Kardashian pitted against an emaciated looking Keira Knightly or Portia de Rossi? How much photo-shopping had gone on with the pictures used? But if I take my pessimism out of the equation, it’s both illuminating and encouraging that average is okay.

So whilst my BMI might suggest I’m grossly overweight, all is not lost as regards my sex appeal. Maybe Craig was right and I shouldn’t be too harsh with myself.

 


Exercising in the cold #OpBabyWeight

Posted on

I have now finally come to the conclusion that diet alone is not going to shrink these love handles. As excited as I am about my upcoming fat freezing treatment, and a new partnership with Juice Plus+’s protein shakes, I have to accept that sitting on the sofa and writing this blog for 4 hours a day, isn’t conducive to my grand weightloss ambitions.

fainting-couch

The problem is, I’m officially rubbish at exercising.

I have several exercise DVDs that are still sat in their wrappers, my treadmill has become a clothes horse in my lounge, and the only time I seem to discover any real motivation to brave the massive hill beyond my front door is when I have run out of cigarettes.

For someone who is beauty-obsessed and spends hours indulging in spa-like activities at home, this laissez-faire attitude to exercising isn’t great; it makes me look like a massive fraud to all those following and joining in with #OpBabyWeight, and means I’ll be waiting considerably longer to make that catwalk debut.

Put frankly, I seem to constantly whinge about my weight, yet do absolutely nothing about it.

Well come the New Year (see how even now I’m putting it off!) I’ll have a little more time on my hands to dedicate to #OpBabyWeight. Dexter will be lovingly bundled off to the nursery fairies who will be forced to deal with his daily tantrums and flat-out refusal to potty train, and Heidi is such a sweet baby we barely notice her anyway.

Rather than sign up to an extortionately priced gym that I’m unlikely to ever visit, I’m going to buy a pair of trainers (yep, I haven’t owned a pair since 1994) and get out into the fresh air. I appreciate this is a change of lifestyle on a par with undergoing a sex change, but I have an ulterior motive for such a radical plan - I figure being forced out into the cold and watching mummy knock herself out with star jumps in a field, will tire out my little angel and maybe reintroduce her to the wonder of afternoon naps.

All I need is the right gear to transform this sofa-princess into an off-roader - and I don’t even have to brave the rain to buy it with awesome online stores like e-outdoor.co.uk stocking everything I’ll need. From insulated jackets to waterproofs, sunglasses to walking boots, there’s everything I need to ensure I stay warm. With brands such as Rab, Barbour, Canada Goose and Paramo to clad myself in - I won’t look like an amateur either. Better yet, this is such a departure from my usual get-up that it’ll the perfect disguise if I make a massive fool out of myself and end up face-down in among the daisies.

So here is my wishlist for the New Year - as I suspect my family are likely to be wracking their brains for Christmas and birthday gifts for the girl who has it all, any of the following would be greatly appreciated!

e-outdoor

Montane Womens Featherlite Down Jacket now £142.40 (was £180) / Canada Goose Womens Kensington Parka £750 / Sealskinz Waterproof Cable Knit Beanie now £22.45 (was £28) / Sprayway Womens Rana Half-Zip Top now £39.90 (was £49.95) / Barbour Womens Beckwith Jumper now £55.96 (was £79.95) / Jack Wolfskin Womens Merino Long Shirt now £45 (was £75) / Extremities Innsbruck Bobble Beanie now £21.25 (was £25) / Extremities Sticky Power Liner Glove now £12.75 (was £15) / Extremities Womens Whistler Snood now £18.70 (was £22)

Oh, and if I go missing and you see Craig panicking about my whereabouts on Facebook, tell him to check all nearby fields. Thanks.


#OpBabyWeight: Exante Diet review: Not for me

Posted on

55d0ecc7b1801e51e43bbcbe6dcffcc7

I was kindly sent a huge envelope stuffed full of Exante samples way back in late August, and it’s taken me this long to wade through them. I feel slightly apprehensive about this one because I’ve actually dipped in and out of it and haven’t stuck to the plan at all.

But then I asked myself why? Why did I find it so hard to stick to?

I think in order for a ‘paid-for’ diet plan to be successful, they have to make their food, drinks, hell… even their entire brand messaging compelling. Too many brands fixate on before and after pics, cheesy ‘we’re all in it together’ advertising or scientific jargon. All a busy woman (or man for that matter) really wants is something easy to prepare and delicious. That’s what we pay for, or we’d all simply buy a recipe book and make it ourselves. We want to forget we’re dieting.

On the face it, Exante Diet offered some of this. Take 1 sachet 3 times a day. How simple and uncomplicated is that?!

mixed-pack-content

But therein lies the problem. Every time we reach for a sachet and whisk its contents into something to stop our stomachs cramping from hunger, we’re very consciously dieting. For the first few days it’s novel, even satisfying, but then you quickly tire of having to wash up your whisk or blender in preparation for your next one. You start to crave something solid. Your child’s Heinz Biscotti starts to literally call to you from the kitchen cupboard.

Its website doesn’t help. Sure, there’s no bright and cheerful tat on the homepage, but it’s gone too far the other way; It’s positively boring. And then there’s the jargon. Before selecting a diet plan we’re asked to calculate our BMI (cue scales, a tape measure and asking the bloke how tall he thinks you are) then we select one of these hugely appealing options:

Capture

It gets no better when you click on your chosen plan:

Capture1

You visit the shop and still there are no sexy food pics to tempt you. Instead you’re bombarded with more choices; 4 week bumper packs, boxes of 50, stater packs… Boxes of what??? I want to know what this diet entails. When you eventually do get to the food pictures they’re too little and the descriptions are dour and unappetizing (take this example from a Box-of-50 selection):

index

I should point out that I wasn’t sent the above product. I was sent sachets of shakes, maple syrup pancakes, tomato and basil soup, pasta carbonara, chicken curry and various other meals. This wasn’t the fault of the PR company I received them through - she was lovely and professional from start to finish. But it’s pretty hard to sex up what is essentially an indefinite stint of powder. In fact I didn’t even look at the website (entirely deliberately) beforehand so this was my first experience of the brand.

Now to taste. I can’t fault the shakes. They were thick, delicious and filling. There are tons of flavours too: Banana, Chocolate, Strawberry, Vanilla, Chocolate Mint, Toffee Caramel, Hazelnut, White Chocolate & Raspberry, Cherries & Berries, Lemon & Raspberry, Christmas Pudding… they really have this sewn up. Handily they don’t require milk either, just cool water and a whisk. For convenience I noticed they also have Shake and Go options. If I’d received 3 weeks worth of these, I might have stood a chance of lasting a week.

But I didn’t.

The soups were hit and miss. I quite liked the tomato and herb flavours but the mushroom flavour (usually a favourite of mine) was inedible. There was a thick taste of chalk and this was despite vigorous whisking. As you’re only instructed to use 200/250mls of water there’s no diluting it further either.

002

There’s no dressing this one up: The offending Mushroom Soup

Dinner-wise I only tried a handful of them as these were all I was provided with. They taste heavily salted and look pretty unappetising. But then what do you expect of powder stirred then blitzed with a microwave. It’s pretty hard to be enthusistic.

030

The best I could do photography-wise: The Pasta Carbonara

Now to price, there’s no denying this is one of the most affordable diet options out there. But even this is hard to decipher. A 4 week box of pre-selected shakes, bars, soups and hot meals from the across the range is listed at £150 RRP but there’s currently an offer for 27% discount (random number) which takes it to £109.99. THEN there’s a mystery discount code to apply at the checkout. Having tried this I received a further £33 off the total bringing it to £76.99. Whether this “mystery discount” is unique to me or pot luck I have no idea.

My point? It’s confusing. I don’t want to be seen to be whinging about mega savings, but at the end of that lot you have no idea whether you’re getting a steal or not.

Compared to a few other diet plans:

Diet

I know I’ve been a little unfair comparing Exante to pre-prepared meals (fresh; Balance Box and My Food; or otherwise Diet Chef) delivered to your door, but I wanted to highlight its only selling point; I’m aware that this is one of the only truly affordable diet plans on the market for the cash-strapped.

In summary, I couldn’t stick to this diet psychologically or physically. I have no doubt whatsoever this diet will work if stuck to, and I think if I’d have been truly motivated I might have lost a little more than 5lbs in the one week I ‘stuck’ to it. But my sanity is worth far more than dropping a dress size.

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...