Reading Town’s Firework Display 2013 - Worth a Giggle

Posted on

You either love them, or you hate them. Either way you’ll most likely have recorded X Factor this weekend and headed off to a fireworks display. We did. We whacked on an unprecedented amount of layers and begrudgingly headed off to one held at Reading Town Football Club.

All the usual insanity that comes with a one-off local event ensued. We were helpfully shown how to park by what seemed like the entire Reading barracks of the Territorial army - that’s 5 boys and girls in army fatigues stationed every 20 metres to wave us into a clearly defined car parking space we were perfectly capable of finding ourselves. Once in the football ground there was the usual 30 metre queue to the clubhouse where people were happy to queue for over an hour to get a pint in a plastic cup, and dozens of teenage girls in inappropriate clothing. Not for the first time, I made a mental note to host a mini family party at home next time.

This year the organiser’s managed some surprisingly passable entertainment. For £5 entry fee you’re not exactly expecting an Artic Monkey’s concert, but the organiser’s focused their attention on Reading’s talent, and a host of local acts performed on a rickety stage in a pokey corner of the football ground. We watched a young pop group (EverYoung) perform covers of Katie Perry’s Roar & Robin Thicke’s Blurred Lines and were especially impressed. If these guys aren’t planning on applying to X Factor next year, I’ll be really surprised.

They also bravely invited X Factor’s local boy Fil Henley to the stage. This guy had me cringing a few weeks back when he made it through to perform in front of a live audience at Wembley. If you’re racking your brains trying to work out which reject I’m talking about. He was the ‘Rock God’ with Jim Morrison-inspired hair that still lives at home with his mum. Famed for flipping a chair in the audition room to prove his rock credentials, he went on to perform shirtless at Wembley, flicking his hair around like Slash whilst murdering That’s Metal (To My Ears).

I won’t be too cruel, he was actually great entertainment. I was in fits of giggles when the wind blew the microphone from its stand and he fumbled his guitar to retrieve it. Somehow, the instrumental continued in the background whilst he went handsfree to grope around on the stage for his mike - very funny. Despite this, he showed himself to have an infectious sense of humour and sounded great when the wind wasn’t howling in protest. I don’t think he was especially pleased though as his set was cut short by 80% as Reading’s answer to Flawless overran. Dexter seemed to enjoy it though and even tried to mount the stage to join him!

Speaking of Dexter, he had a great time doing laps of the poorly lit football pitch. His toddling is coming along really well but he does appear to have issues changing direction. Plucking him out of his pushchair for a quick stretch of his legs will see him running away without so much as a backward glance at mummy and daddy. We needn’t have bothered popping on all those additional layers as trailing in Dexter’s wake is a work-out in itself.

We didn’t bother with ear defenders as we knew he’d rip them from his head in seconds. He didn’t seem bothered at all by the bangs, in fact, he didn’t seem bothered about the fireworks either. I think he was just enjoying the novelty of being out past 7pm.

I definitely felt some flutterings when the display started - baby 2 was either very excited, or totally distressed by all the noise. Craig wrapped his arms my waist and placed his hands on my belly and this seemed to settle things back down. This was probably my highlight to be honest - it’s getting to the point where Craig will be able to feel some kicks and that should make the whole pregnancy feel far more real.

Leaving the show at the end of the display felt a little like Hillsborough. Far from being melodramatic, I’m very surprised no one got hurt. There was lots of elbowing trying to get out and I even clocked a few mums hauling their pushchairs over fences. Dexter was really distressed and I found myself popping a protective arm around my bump. If the organiser’s somehow wind up reading this - please ensure there’s a dedicated exit for pushchair users next time.

So that’s it. Another bonfire night over. God help us when there’s two children to contend with next year. I might beg off and let the boys go alone. It’s that, or get a few crappy fireworks from Tesco and hold a party in our back garden.

What did you all get up to?


Headlines from your first 6 months

Posted on

So tomorrow you turn 6 months!

With all chaos you’ve created over the last 183 days - keeping on top of news stories from around the world hasn’t been much of a priority. As this is your blog, it isn’t lost on me that you’ll be cringing on occasion and will probably beg me not to direct future girlfriends to this site. As much as you’ll probably be delighted to know when you first clutched a toy, sat unaided, spoke your first words - I suspect you’ll also have lots of questions about what the world was like when you were born.

Here’s a mini round-up of things from your first half-year you might want to know:

PRICE OF MILK: It will probably make you giggle that I had to Google this. Mummy is so used to just shoving things in the trolley and whipping her battered card out at the checkout, I’m not really one for paying attention to prices. However, a two pint carton will set you back 90 pence on average.

AVERAGE HOUSE VALUE: Where we live (and you were born) in Reading the average house value is £248,486 according to the BBC News website. This is really expensive and you can buy lots of toys with that kind of dosh. A further breakdown reveals the following: Detached: £461,751 / Semi-detached : £272,813 / Terrace : £207,356 / Flat : £175,903.

Needless to say mummy and daddy can’t afford to buy a house right now so we’re renting. Our monthly rent is £850 per month (it should be a little more but we’re currently renting a friend’s house). We have plans to buy a house all of our own in a few years time. This will give you some security when you grow up and need money to go to university (if you want to) before you make your own millions. I suspect inflation will make these figures seem laughable when you’re old enough to read this - but you have to remember that our wages are probably much lower than those you’ll be commanding when you join the England Rugby team.

TOP TV SHOWS: Major successes over the last 6 months have been Homelands, Downton Abbey, X Factor, and The Only Way is Essex. Quite an eclectic mix there and mummy doesn’t like all of them.

I should point out now that this is set in the post-Edwardian era and mummy and daddy don’t dress like this. In fact, you’re very lucky if mummy gets dressed at all. Right now it’s 3 o’clock and mummy is still in her dressing gown.

BLOCKBUSTERS: Major films in the cinema since you’ve been born are Skyfall and the Dark Knight Rises. Mummy is not the best person to ask if these films are any good as she hates the cinema, and hates spy / superhero things. Daddy, on-the-otherhand, loves it. When you’re old enough - we’ll get these films on blu-ray (or whatever the equivalent is when you’re reading this) so you can see what all the fuss is about.

MUSIC: When you were born R.I.P by Rita Ora ft. Tinie Tempah was No.1 in the download / chart thingy. It’s very confusing nowadays as people have iTunes and don’t buy music in the shops. Because of this, it’s quite difficult to say what is No1 at all! Rita Ora is relatively new to the music scene but she’s quite popular. The song was okay but hardly the most memorable and I doubt you’ll be able to select it on pub jukeboxes when you’re older.

The song that reminds me most of you (and makes mummy cry like an idiot) is Gary Barlow’s Sing ft. the Military Wives. For the record, this admission won’t earn me any street cred points and this is not mummy’s usual music choice. What makes it so special is that I remember vividly being sat in bed absolutely exhausted from breast-feeding and crying buckets. I was looking down at you in your Moses basket and my tears were dripping on your little face. There was a documentary on about the making of this song and I was literally too tired and emotional to change the channel. I felt completely in love with you and totally overwhelmed. This got to No.1 the month after you were born.

Sing - Gary Barlow & The Commonwealth Band featuring Military Wives

HEADLINES: These leads me nicely into one of the major headlines of your little life so far as Barlow’s song was written for the Queen’s Diamond Jubilee. I won’t write too much about this as mummy has kept loads of clippings and magazines dedicated to this event for you to read when you’re older. Mummy used to live in London and there was a regatta just minutes away from where mummy used to live. There were also big concerts to celebrate the Queen’s 60th year on the throne.

The Olympics were also held in London for the first time in over 50 years. Mummy had been really excited about this and joked when she was pregnant that her maternity-leave would coincide nicely with the games. Unfortunately mummy spent most of this time asleep exhausted from the nightfeeds!

The UK had a fantastic games and a number of athletes are now household names as a result of the medals they won. Among the greatest were Jessica Ennis, Mo Farah and Victoria Pendleton. I’m hoping the Olympic legacy will live on and there’ll be more opportunity for you to take part in specialist sports as a result. I’ll be proud of you no matter what you do in life - but it would be a major perk if you managed to secure us finals tickets to watch you someday.

Across the pond, the US elections have just come to an end. Barack Obama is now to serve his second term which mummy is very pleased about. Mummy is very interested in politics and stayed up to watch Obama retain his presidency against Republican Mitt Romney. It was predicted it would be a closely contested race but it turns out Obama won comfortably and won’t face any serious challenge. Mummy believe this is a good thing as we’re still in the grip of recession and the world economy needs consistency during this time. Obama is the US’s first ever African American president and mummy thinks he’s the best they’ve ever had. My hope is that he’ll still be in office as you grow up.

Of course there have been other major stories over the last 6 months, some of them not so positive which I won’t talk about here. I’m quite excited that we’ve welcomed you into the world at possibly the most exciting time in British history. When you are an old man you’ll be able to say you were alive when Britain hosted the 2012 games and the Queen became the Britain’s longest reigning monarch second only to Queen Victoria (maybe she’ll have overtaken her by the time you’re reading this). Of course from mummy and daddy’s perspective the biggest story from the last 6 months, and biggest event of our lives so far is You. Dexter Thomas Mills born 16th May 2012.

pixel Headlines from your first 6 months