Tag Archives: Exercising when Pregnant

Mar 21 2014

Day 1: Operation #GetBabyOut

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As I’ve now reached the dizzying heights of week 37 (well I’m 2 days early but who’s counting? Well actually I am, every minute of every hour but let’s brush that to one side) I’ve gone on strike. I’m now mounting Operation #GetBabyOut which is similar in scale to the military’s quest a few years ago to flush out Bin Laden. I’ve decided I will not be leaving the house until I’m en route to the hospital to deliver Mini Madam.

And this Mama is serious. Look, I’m in full camouflage and everything! (I’m not good at looking mean - I look constipated).

For the next few days (not weeks, as it won’t take that long) I’ll be trying out various techniques to tempt her out.

First up… Pineapple

Yep, despite hating the stuff, I force fed myself two Del Monte tins of yellow goodness this morning, Proud of myself and waiting for one almighty contraction I took to Facebook and Twitter to share my achievement. Within seconds I was delicately informed that the pineapple needs to be fresh (tinned pineapple doesn’t have the correct enzymes) = #Fail1.

What’s more, according to Tina from The Trials and Tribulations of a Brummie Mummy apparently you’d have to eat at least 8 of these bad boys to even stand a chance of ousting baby. The idea is to bring on a bout of diarrhoea that will kick start the process. Tina also helpfully informed me that her midwife once quipped she’s seen some disastrous births with mums disgracing themselves via both ends as a result of scoffing pineapples and curries.

Result: I can’t manage another bitter mouthful. I seriously don’t fancy pooping my way through labour anyway. Those tins were eaten in good faith and it seems I’ve already buggered up the operation. For an hour after this torment Mini Madam went to sleep anyway so I can report I’m aborting this stage and moving onto plan B.

Plan B - Raspberry Tea

I don’t drink tea. In fact, I don’t drink any hot drinks at all. If I were thinking in any way rationally I’d have waddled my way to Holland & Barrett and bought capsules, but no. I sent out the bloke to ASDA and got him to buy tea. To his eternal credit, he did ring me from the tea aisle and tell me that they didn’t stock it. Raspberry did feature in various fruity concoctions, but not on it’s own. Having insisted he read each one out to me (rather, he shouted them as the signal was pants) I finally opted for Twinnings Pomegranate and Raspberry.

Having had three of these of these today I’m now frequently stopping typing for a wee. It’s fairly sickly, and not sitting all that well with the pineapple so it’s a only slight improvement on plan A, and it seems it’s just as flipping fruitless too. Literally.

Yep my Twinning tea is extract only. It’s probably made by scientists in a warehouse somewhere filling up conical flasks with flavourings out of tiny bottles marked with E123s, not lovingly prepared in Japan by tiny women picking and drying out leaves as I’d (somewhat ignorantly) envisaged #Fail2.

Result: All I’ve achieved by drinking this garbage is turning my wee red and bringing about a case of the number 2′s. Baby is probably laughing at me in there.

Last Resort: Jogging and Mum-Twerking

This was never supposed to be dangerous. I’m not opposed to looking like a prat, but I didn’t ever imagine giving myself an injury. Yet, in the five minutes I jogged around the sofa in my lounge this is exactly what I’ve done. I only actually managed 5 laps of the sofa before I realised it was pointless. My boobs had flown out of my bra and Dexter was regarding me curiously and pulling at his tee shirt in a bid to expose himself in sympathy.

It seems this plan requires a gym kit. I’d need a sports bra and something with a higher neckline than my maternity vest top . Taking a few slaps on the chin by my own breasts seemed to jolt me back to reality with a bump #Fail3.

Despite the jogging not working, I did succeed in waking up my daughter. Deciding I could simulate the jogging movement by simply bouncing on the spot, or some gentle upright twerking, I’ve since managed at least ten minutes of this every hour for the last three.

Result: In my head, I’m gently coaxing her further down my belly and low into my uterus. In reality, I’m probably either amusing her or getting on her wick. With each bounce I’m probably doing irreparable damage to my bladder too. I’m fairly optimistic something is going on though. Another week of this and she’ll be hammering down below in a bid for freedom. Surely? And all I’ll have lost is every scrap of my dignity! A small price to pay?

So that’s Day 1. A complete waste of time? I’ll let you all know tomorrow.

 

Jan 7 2014

25 Weeks Pregnant!

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So I’m now 25 weeks pregnant (although I prefer to tell myself I have only have 15 weeks to go). I’m actually feeling a little brighter this week (try not to faint in shock) but that’s probably down to the fact I’ve been a busy bee with my birthday celebrations and various other distractions.

My Yoga DVD has arrived (courtesy of those poor overworked people at Amazon) yet is still sat in its wrapper in the kitchen - if DVDs had eyes, this one would be eyeballing me accusingly every time I pour myself a glass of orange juice. In fact, I give it two more days and Craig will start moaning about it too. He bought it for me to help ease the tension in my muscles, and the fact it’s yet to say hello to the DVD player must be incredibly irritating.

Bump 25 Weeks 25 Weeks Pregnant!

In actual fact, I have been feeling a little more flexible in the mornings this week. I put it down to the fact that Dexter is transitioning from cotbed to big boy bed so I wake up totally paranoid and spring out of bed like the house is on fire. Nothing takes your mind off all the stiffness quite like the fear of discovering your child is eerily staring at you as you sleep (just inches away from your face), or catching him mid-experiment trying to work out if your iPhone (stealthily plucked from your bedside drawer) will float in the en suite toilet.

The strangest symptom this week has definitely been my lack of appetite. In fact, I weighed myself a few days ago and was shocked to discover I weigh less than I did before I got pregnant! Now I know I’ve ‘made friends’ with the loo these last few months but this seems impossible to me. I’m forever underestimating just how wide a berth my belly needs when I’m out and about, and am consequently always banging it against lamp posts, doors and well everything really - I can’t believe baby + her baggage could possibly weigh any less than Ronnie Corbett! Here’s hoping when she’s here and we’ve got the whole breastfeeding thing nailed, I’ll have dropped a few dress sizes.

Still I know that (despite the daily bashing) Mini Madam is perfectly healthy as she’s up all night bouncing in my tummy. It’s one wild party animal I have in there as she crams in the sleep she needs during the day instead. I’m hoping against hope this won’t be her routine when she’s here in person!

I’ve also now reached the point where I can’t physically do up my jacket and my boots won’t zip up over my calf muscles. This means I’m rocking tatty Converses and Craig’s sweatshirts when I’m out and about. A few days ago I sat on a park bench to rest my weary ankles, and a passerby tried to plonk 20p into my frappuccino cup! Looking back on this now I can giggle, but at the time I was suitably mortified! Never again will I leave the house without make up on!

Having caught up with some serious reading over the New Year - I can now report that Mini Madam now has open nostrils, a gum full of teeth buds, and is covered in a soft layer of protective hair (lanugo). If she did decide to make a dash for it now, she’d have a 1 in 4 change of survival. Despite this, a quick Google search of pics of 25 week foetuses suggests there’s a remarkably life-like baby chilling out in my belly (I’m not quite sure what I expected… a cartoon version perhaps). Still, I’ll give it another 14 weeks before I start sipping on the raspberry tea, begging Craig for an Indian, or dragging him upstairs for an early night - she can stay right where she is.

Until next time guys!

 

 

Jul 23 2013

What to Expect… The DVDs

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The full extent of my pregnancy fitness was cradling my bump on the bus on the way to work. By the time I got home every night I was utterly exhausted. I’d heard all the hype about swimming, but having dived into a pool several years ago and got my hair caught in a vent, you’d be lucky to get me in a body of water any more substantial tan Dexie’s paddling pool.

But this time around I’ll be considerably more careful. I’m the heaviest I’ve ever been at the moment and put it all down to lack of exercise both before and after Dexter’s birth. As soon I get those 2 pink lines I’ll be donning the maternity lycra and slipping on (every pregnant woman’s secret weapon) What To Expect When You’re Expecting: The Workout, and trying my best to join in.

So my contribution to exercise (and Project Baby 2) this week has been to watch this DVD whilst laying on the floor with Dexter re-learning Silent Night on his Leapfrog xylophone. I haven’t attempted one lunge, pelvic floor or squat, but I’m full of admiration for the tiny people on the telly doing their best to inspire me.

I blame this blog, the heat, lack of appropriate footwear, and a child that refuses to play independently with anything remotely age-appropriate - seriously, I had to pluck keyboard keys from my laptop out of his mouth yesterday morning. I’m not complaining - I’ve just written off bikinis for this upcoming holiday and picked ‘forgiving’ dresses that will minimise the chance of a foreign waiter asking me ‘when I’m due’.

In all seriousness, this is a pretty impressive DVD packed full of easy and safe exercises for the mum-to-be. Keeping fit in pregnancy is actually incredibly important and no laughing matter. There are a whole host of benefits including preparing yourself for the rigours of childbirth, improved sleep and guarding again gestational diabetes. There’s Pilates-based moves and yoga-inspired stretches to help build stamina and rejuvenate aching and tight muscles. Thankfully the soundtrack is also less ’70′s disco’ than other pregnancy workout DVDs too.

But for now, as the heat is crippling, I’m way behind with my blog posts, and there’s chilled wine in the fridge that might not last until Craig gets home, I’ll make myself comfortable and watch the very funny What to Expect When You’re Expecting (the movie) instead.

Centred on the upcoming births of 3 women, the film follows each of them and their hapless other halves to D Day. I thought it was heartwarming and funny, and dealt with some pretty tough issues (miscarriage and adoption) in a sensitive way. Sadly Craigy found it a little patronising. Craig was very hands on throughout my pregnancy and is probably a more natural parent than I, so he gets a little pee’ed off when he sees dumbed-down-dad’s on the tv. If he’d only watch one episode of One Born Every Minute he’d quickly realise what a rare (and sought after) commodity he is and I’d lose him to a considerably yummier mummy from Dexter’s playgroup!

There’s lots to like about this movie, and most mums will see snippets of their own experience of pregnancy in each of the characters. From the desperate-to-be-pregnant Wendy (Elizabeth Banks) with her cringeworthy breastfeeding children’s book and his and hers ovulation alarm, to the mum-to-be (Cameron Diaz) that refuses to slow down, to the mum (Brooklyn Decker) whose fertility knows no bounds and winds up sneezing out her first born twin.

The only thing that’s apt to make you raise your eyebrows is how utterly gorgeous all the mums-to-be look with their incredibly cute baby bumps (I didn’t spot one scene without a large helping of mascara and lipgloss) - I certainly didn’t look like that pushing my trolley around Tescos in my 8th month!

You can find both these DVDs on Amazon, or check out the new website to learn about all things pregnancy, baby and beyond. The WTE UK team can also be found on Facebook and Twitter and are always on hand to answer those questions that just can’t wait - do pop over and show them some love.

DISCLAIMER: The What to Expect team kindly sent me both DVDs for the purpose of this review, but all views and opinions are my own.

 

 

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